Michael Dickey's mother explains her stand
Michael Dickey's mother says she never asked that Novi magistrate Judith Holtz be suspended. What she did, says Karen Dickey, was file a complaint with the Michigan Judicial Tenure Commission "so they will conduct an investigation of what was said in court so other people do not have to go in to court and be treated inappropriately."
Michael Dickey is the 20-year-old from Farmington Hills whom Holtz lambasted in court last month after he followed two past drunk driving incidents with another arrest, this time for wandering down Novi Road with a blood alcohol concentration of .223.
Holtz somewhat controversially suggested that if Dickey were so determined to kill himself, there were other, quicker ways to do it. If you'll scroll down, you'll see I defended her for what I thought was not a call for suicide, but rather a forceful message.
In an even-tempered e-mail, Karen Dickey disagrees with my interpretation.
"I understand the message she was trying to convey and the frustration she must feel with my son," Mrs. Dickey says. "My complaint is that she could have said it in a manner which would have been more appropriate. She did not do that and in fact she took it a step further by suggesting two different methods of suicide."
Free Wii golf for expensive prizes
There's never a shortage of promotional events, but I have to give strokes to Shades Optical in Birmingham for originality.
By way of pushing golf-season glasses and sunglasses -- or, if you're a cool spot like Shades, "eyegear" -- the store is holding a Wii golf tournament today from 3-9 p.m. Drive the virtual ball closest to the pin and you can win very real glasses -- I mean, eyegear -- from Tag Heuer.
Golf pro and calendar model Valeria Ochoa will be on hand, though I'm not sure whether she'll be providing virtual opposition or virtual advice. You'll find the store at 193 W. Maple, between the stores selling flowergear and French giftgear.
Taking credit for over-using my card
I knew I'd become obsessed with frequent flier miles the day I found myself charging my lunch at Chicken Shack.
That hasn't stopped me from using the VISA card, mind you. But at least I give myself credit for knowing.
Like many people, I run many of my expenses and even bills through a credit card that gives me a bonus. In my case, it's airline tickets. For other people, it might be cash back or gasoline or a free concert in their rumpus room by Herb Alpert & the Tijuana Brass.
I have no idea why I brought up Herb Alpert, by the way, and I am not altogether sure what a rumpus room is. But I am certain my spending habits would be different, and more responsible, if I went back to paying cash.
Michelle Singletary makes that case convincingly today in the Washington Post. Even people like me who pay their monthly balance in full, she says, are costing themselves money.
Of course, realizing that I'm defrauding myself is not at all the same thing as giving up on the mileage. Hawaii calls, baby.
A fifth of vodka and a thimbleful of common sense
I stopped by Mug & Jug a few minutes ago to buy milk and make another payment toward my retirement plan, which is to say I bought a lotto ticket.
At the other register, Phil the Nice Guy Who Works There was discussing vodkas with three mid-20ish women who sounded like they had one brain cell between them and took turns using it.
Whichever vodka they were looking for, the store apparently didn't have any left. Phil the Nice Guy was assuring them that a brand called Svedka was better than what they originally requested, with the added advantage of being $10 cheaper.
The three women were resistant and suspicious for a good five minutes, all but accusing Phil the Nice Guy of trying to gouge them when in fact he was trying to save them money.
Finally, just as negotiations appeared to have concluded, one of the women acquired the brain cell and asked one last question:
"Does this go good with Red Bull?"
Certainly, dear. It's lovely with Red Bull, just the same way it would be lovely with Pennzoil or Downy fabric softener. And you wouldn't want just any vodka for that.
'American Idol' might not be fixed, but it's spoiled
It's not as though I agonized over "American Idol" anyway. But it truly makes a difference now that we know it's not spontaneous.
The dependably spacey Paula Abdul spilled those particular beans a few shows ago when she commented on Jason Castro's second song, even though he hadn't sung it yet. Come to find out that the judges attend rehearsals, so they not only know in advance what songs are going to be performed, they've heard them.
That made it completely disingenuous tonight when Syesha Mercado sang a torchy version of "Fever" and Simon Cowell dismissed it as a "lame cabaret performance."
He knew she was doing a lounge song after rehearsal, and he probably knew he didn't like it. So his surprise and disgust on the air were 100 percent contrived.
A few words in support of a magistrate's few words
You'll find a story in today's Detroit News about a magistrate in Novi who told a young defendant he might be better off killing himself.
It's a thoroughly legitimate article. The magistrate, Judith Holtz, says she wishes she had phrased things better.
The fact is, though, she had a point. And while it's only natural for the parents of such a messed-up kid to be upset -- I suspect I'd be sleepless and babbling incoherently -- the mother's complaint against Holtz is a deliberate misinterpretation of what was said in court.
The kid in question really isn't one anymore. Michael Robert Dickey of Farmington Hills is 20. When police stopped him as he strolled along Novi Road in June 2007, he blew a startling .223 on the drunk-o-meter -- nearly three times the legal limit of .08.
He'd had two Operating While Intoxicated convictions previously, and as you might expect, he had promised in the other cases to remain drug- and alcohol-free.
The drug part came into play Monday, when he showed up for a probation appointment with cocaine, marijuana and amphetamines in his system.
His mom, Karen Dickey, says the amphetamines were part of a medication Michael has a prescription for. The other stuff landed him in rehab.
As for the magistrate's role in all of this, Holtz lit into Michael Dickey when she had him in court for sentencing April 10.
"I don't mean to be offensive," she said, "but you have two Operating While Intoxicated convictions and then you blow a .223 and you're still not 21? Here is my suggestion to you, Mr. Dickey, climb up on the roof of your house and jump off. Either that or get in a bathtub filled with hot water and slash your wrists; then you will be dead; it will be cheaper; it will be faster and in the long run it will be less painful to anybody who cares about you."
Holtz didn't add this thought to the mix, but it also won't claim any innocent lives.
Clearly, she was not instructing Dickey to commit suicide. She was telling him, dramatically and forcefully, that he seems hell-bent on killing himself already, and that he will succeed if he doesn't get a grip on his problems.
Dickey's mother says she wants Holtz suspended "so that other people don't have to be told this because they have a disease."
I'm sympathetic, both to a parent's distress and the kid's apparent addiction. But Dickey is a menace to himself and he has a history of being a menace to others.
If Holtz was indelicate in attempting to get his attention, so be it. At least she was trying.
Avoid Internet pirates with help from AARP, matey
Exactly one legitimate organization will give you free annual credit reports from the three bureaus in charge of getting them just wrong enough to mess up your life.
According to the AARP, an organization whose name has always struck me as the sound a pirate makes when he burps, you can trust www.annualcreditreport.com.
All those e-mails you get from companies offering free credit reports are one of two things:
Outright scams from people trying to steal important personal information, or services that give you free access for about 11 1/2 days before they slap a $99 annual fee onto your credit card.
If you'd like to contact the good guys and you don't use a computer, you can call (877) 322-8228. Of course, if you don't use a computer, you don't have to worry about fraudulent e-mails in the first place. And come to think of it, you probably aren't reading detnews.com.
Which smart theory is smarter? Heck if I know
There are two theories about the smart car, the French-made Mercedes-Benz micro-compact that I obsessed over for years before it arrived in the U.S. and ultimately decided not to buy.
Theory No. 1 says that despite the current 12-month waiting list, in a few years, everyone who wants a smart will have one. The phenomenon that saw 30,000 people put down $99 deposits before the first domestic smarts showed up in January will fade away.
Theory No. 2 says that the more smarts are visible on the road, the more people will say, "Hey, I gotta get me one of them little critters."
Me, I couldn't tell you which way things will go. But $4 gasoline makes a car rated at 33/41 mpg look just that much cuter.
The Tigers: No need to panic, but I still like the T-shirt
The consistently clever miscreants behind Tabloid T-Shirts have weighed in on the Detroit Tigers' lurching start. Tweaking the team's "Who's your Tiger" advertising campaign, the makers of pointed and timely shirts and bumper stickers and such have come out with an alternate question:
"Where's Your Tiger?"
My favorite from Tabloid T's continues to be the one built around an unsmiling photo of former mayoral chief of staff Christine Beatty. Reinterpreting the challenge she threw at two police officers who pulled her over for speeding, the caption asks, "Do you know who the @%$# I am?"
Other highlights from the catalog include green images of Detroit City Council president Ken Cockrel Jr. labeled "Shrek for Mayor," and a look at morning team co-host Drew Lane's awkward departure from WRIF-FM (101.1). Changing the station's familiar oval logo to read RIFT 101, Tabloid T-Shirts wonders, "Who and Mike?"
As for the Tigers, keep the faith. Erratic as they've been, they're still only 3 1/2 games out of the lead in their division.
I said weeks ago that before 40 games were gone, they'd be at .500 and on the move. That won't happen, though they got as close as 14-15 before tanking at Minnesota last week. But they can easily pull even by game 60, with 102 left to play after that.
Who should pay Rich Rodriguez' buyout? He says U-M
University of Michigan football coach Rich Rodriguez' accountant knows exactly who should pay West Virginia University the $4 million Rodriguez owes for bailing out on his contract:
Anybody but Rich Rodriguez.
Taking the typical Big-Time College Coach attitude that contracts are one-sided instruments designed to protect but not inconvenience Big-Time College Coaches, Rodriguez is trying to weasel out of the buyout.
Detroit News sports reporter Fred Girard reveals that according to CPA David Hammack, if Rodriguez can't beat the buyout in court, he wants U-M to pick up the tab.
Incredibly, to quote Girard's story, "Michigan officials did not deny that possibility exists."
Rodriguez and the university still don't have a contract. But the letter of intent regarding their six-year agreement calls for him to receive $2.5 million per annum in base salary and other compensation, plus as much as $300,000 in performance bonuses, the right to run Michigan's lucrative summer football camp, insurance and retirement benefits, and two cars.
That should keep him happy, right up until the instant he gets a better offer and bolts to another school.
Maybe the most startling figure in Rodriguez' deal is that his nine assistant coaches, combined, will earn nearly $2 million.
Over in the math department, where I suspect precious few people make six figures, they can tell you the split works out to an average of more than $210,000 per coach.
